Sunday, December 10, 2006

Worst birthday ever turned good.

"It is never too late to be what you might have been." ~George Eliot.

Today is part 2 of my birthday. I'm not sure if that's legal, but my real birthday (yesterday) was the worst one I've ever had and well...I decided to give it a second chance. After all, there's something about this year that feels important--and I want it to start out the right way.

Yesterday had great potential except that I woke up sicker than a dog and, to make matters worse, had to work all day at the garden shop. I had originally looked forward to it, but instead I spent the day being miserable and tired and weepy. I survived it. But I might have been better off never leaving my bed. Last night I sat down at my computer to write about it and let's just say that when I woke up this morning I was glad I hadn't. Maybe some things are just better left unsaid.

I do, however, want to tell you what was good about yesterday... and one of those those things goes by the name of "Saturnalia"...which is our neighborhood holiday celebration hosted, in part, by our garden shop.

They blocked off the street and celebrated by filling everybody up with freshly roasted chestnuts (which brought be straight back to the streets of Italy--taste bud heaven!), hot chocolate and cider, cookies, smores and hot dogs. We built several bon-fires on the sidewalks and in the street; there were face-painters and hay-rides; Santa climbed DOWN the coffee shop's chimney; there were puppets on stilts and dancing snowmen; the air was filled with wood smoke and the steady beat of the Women's Drum Corp; there was dancing in the street; people brought their dogs and kids. It was really quite incredible and made me feel the stirrings of love for my new neighborhood and their pagan-esque celebrations. And even though I felt like hell there was a part of me that thoroughly enjoyed it. The drumming, the dancing, the weather, the general was pretty cool.

See...when I write about it in this way, it makes it sound like a good day. Never mind the rest because...what it boils down to is that it's all a matter of perspective, isn't it. Maybe I feel better about yesterday because I'm looking at these photos or because of the really incredible sleep I got last night. I don't know...but today I feel much better--which is why I've self-proclaimed today as my birthday also. hey--why not? Yesterday I let myself get knocked over by my own personal tidal wave of shitness and today I decided to stand myself up again. Today...well, today has been better than yesterday by a million miles.

Some of the best things about turning 32:
  • an e-mail from bee
  • birthday wishes from ruby
  • an e-card from my fellow sagettarian jamie
  • loralee's voice singing me happy birthday on the phone
  • waking up to find presents from my husband sitting on my desk
  • reading his wonderful card
  • phone calls from family
  • going out for spicy hot indian cuisine (soul food for sniffles!)
  • good conversation and mochas with mardougrrl...and a bag full of really perfect presents (i'm spoiled!) ;)
  • coming face to face with the biggest buck i've ever seen--in my front yard!! (yes, my life is surreal like this, but i'm serious)
  • blog comments
  • much needed sleep
  • neighbors coming to visit me at the garden shop--yes, people actually came just to see me! (it made me feel loved)
  • going music shopping with my husband (the rest of his gift to me...i should write more about this later)
  • pancakes
  • dog kisses
  • husband hugs
  • nice clean fluffy fleece sheets and the best sleep ever!
  • dreaming about dogs
  • sunny weather
  • a long walk
  • frozen lakes
  • going sweater shopping and finding something cozy that i liked!
  • an incredibly patient husband who survived my day of moods and still loves me anyway
  • russian tea cakes
  • champaign
  • a new candle
  • good coffee
Hell yeah...I guess it was a pretty damn good birthday...despite false starts.


Anonymous said...

oh, if i was closer you would have gotten a birthday hug from me, too!!! i missed your words and thought of you often this weekend...i was hoping you were having a good birthday..glad it ended up well...xoxo....

Kristine said...

Happy Birthday! I wanted to get you something! I thought of you so much this weekend! Sounds like it was a great time!

Vesper said...

Happy Birthday!!!
my new blog:

swampgrrl said...

happy birthday, dear grrl.
sounds like you did a lot of things that were divine.

husband hugs and dog kisses are the best!

Mark said...

Happy birthday, Jess. I hope the second one is even better.

tara dawn said...

Happy belated birthday my sweet friend! I love that you extended your birthday so that your heart could be filled with such joy on such a special occasion. Big smiles on my face as I read your words and I'm sending huge hugs from Georgia. I've been missing you and love you bunches!

Sacred Suzie said...

Happy Birthday! I'm so sorry it's been a bit of a struggle but what an inspiration you are to have found so many positive things to feel good about.

Anonymous said...

happy birthday!

i'm so glad that it turned out to be good...weepy ones SHOULD be cancelled out, outright. i agree.

we should have a coffee together. :)

Anonymous said...

happy birthday!

i'm so glad that it turned out to be good...weepy ones SHOULD be cancelled out, outright. i agree.

we should have a coffee together. :)

Anonymous said...

happy birthday!

i'm so glad that it turned out to be good...weepy ones SHOULD be cancelled out, outright. i agree.

we should have a coffee together. :)

Anonymous said...

i love you.

i'm glad your birthday turned out better - i hope you felt me giving you birthday squeezes from afar.

Anonymous said...

i'm glad you ended up having the birthday that you deserved, sweetie, with drummers to help you usher in a new year and roasted chestnuts and hugs from all the right beings....i hope you felt the squeezes i was sending you from montreal.

sophie said...

oh happy birthday and i so
enjoyed reading this post -
i loved the photos -
and i know i am nosy
but what did your sweetheart get you?

Anonymous said...

Happy birthday (again!)--It felt more like a gift to ME to see you again...especially sans baby. ;)

And the mochas WERE good, weren't they? We'll have to go back there! xoxo, M

Susannah said...

happy birthday beautiful you - i'm so glad it come good in the end :-) xo

sophie said...

i was just wondering -
i love your template and
does it have the spots for
the pix built in?
(i am computer illiterate)

deirdre said...

Oh, belated Happy Birthday to you!!!! I'm so sorry it was kind of a crummy day, but it sure sounds like it got better as it went forward.

Sharon said...

Happy Birthday!
Yesterday was my husband's birthday, too! He is 64, twice as old as you!

bella said...

Happy Birthday Raven. I just turned 32 back in October. It's turning out to be a fabulous year so far! LOL.
My computer froze on your page yesterday and I just left if there, so if you see me on your stat meter for like 24 hours long, now you know why!

Spiky Zora Jones said...

Happy Birthday! Jessie i would have loved to have been sounded like a ton of fun. I know you were sick, but dang, that sounded like so much fun. I was off on vacation...spent lots on money on gifts. It was fun. We put the tree up, wrestled with the ball of christmas lights to up on the house.
Thanks for stopping by at my blogg...I will get started on it after the holidays. Every minute of my time was taken by others and at times hiding in the broom closet was my only escape. I have rebelled and things will be different.
Happyyyyyy Birthdayyyyyy!

Endment said...

With all the wonderful things on your list --- I recommend that you choose to have a birthday every day this year :)

Tammy said...

WOW! HAPPY BIRTHDAY! You are one lucky and loved gal! Karma is grand ;)

Jamie said...

Wonderful! You deserve all the good bits of this glorious time. Look how loved you are! I loved your list of best things. It made me smile from start to end.

And Saturnalia - how awesome! I love pagan-esque-ness :) Dancing, drumming - it's all good!

And I'm a nut for champagne too! Enjoy your year. It's going to be a good one :)

Anonymous said...

I'm glad I read your post. It's my birtday today. I think I'm going to work on turning this day around right now.


Anonymous said...

Sorry this is so late, but happy birthday!

That festival sounds fantastic. A nice little neighborhood you guys have. But I understand the wanting to get back to the woods. I hope you and Anu get plenty of time to romp!

Amber said...

Happy Birthday!!

"coming face to face with the biggest buck i've ever seen--in my front yard!! (yes, my life is surreal like this, but i'm serious)"-- you should look this up in a book about totems. Really! That sounds amazing. I think these things mean something...

I know I am an odd bird. ;)


Jessie said...

Amber--I've been thinking the same thing. ;)

Anonymous said...

Jessie, a belated Bonne Anniversaire! Sorry I missed the actual day. Hope the year ahead is your best one yet! xo