Thursday, September 28, 2006

#1 of 15 questions:

{ok...Melba and miss*R got me started, but the rest will have to wait....}

1. Are you happy/satisfied with your blog's content and look?

The look: Yes, Yes, and Yes! The image on the left side of my blog is from a painting of mine titled "Red Fort" (oil on canvas). The actual painting now lives in my brother's house because it was his favorite from my 2004 exhibit called Portraits of India. In the real painting the man is walking through the sienna colored arches of the Red Fort in Delhi. I remember the moment perfectly. Pairing it with pink was an odd combination, but I doooo like the occasional oddities in life. There will always be a piece of me that remains in India, but since I can't be there physically, my blog transports me in its own way. Anyway, I'd still have a generic Blogger template if it wasn't for my husband. We worked on the design together, but I give him full credit for bringing it to life.

The content: Oh, the content. Geez. Half the time I'm embarrassed half to death by what I publish here. So why do I do it, you ask? Well, mostly because I can't help it. Blogging, for me, has gone through many tranformations. It has meant different things to me at different times, but somewhere along the lines, it has become the writing space that I always go to first. I have always been honest--with both myself and others. Sometimes it is my best quality, while other times it is a serious downfall. Ok....so this is me. In all my craziness, sadness, happiness, and wisdom. I'm a roller-coaster ride. All or nothin', baby. Here I am. This is my writing practice. It is me writing out all the garbage and goodness of my life in order to get out of my own way. And I suppose I could judge myself on how good or bad it is...but, you see, I'm not going to. Because the important thing is that I'm writing.

When teaching, I had my students do a lot of freewriting in class and I would write along with them. I used to tell them not to stop, no matter what. I would tell them to write and keep writing...that it didn't matter if it was any good or not. Just keep writing. I told them that they might surprise themselves, that even if only one nugget of truth or inspiration comes out of, then it's worth it. I would say some version of this nearly every day. And I guess you could say that it became my mantra. But the thing is that it worked. I saw it working for them and I felt it working for myself. I blog in order to keep myself writing on a regular basis. It teaches me about myself. And even though I might frequently embarrass the hell out of myself, I put it out there because I believe that we have something to learn from each other. I put it out there because it makes me more accountable for myself. I put it out there because I can. Writing creates a connection--not only within ourselves, but with others, too.

So, am I content with my content? (notice the word play? ha!) I was going to say no. But in the process of writing, I'd have to say that I've changed my mind to yes.

The amazing thing about writing is that you just never know where it will take you.

7 comments:

sophie said...

I think your template is
fabulous!!!

As for the writing I love
visiting and meandering through
your moods and delights and
longings with you -

I am only half myself without
a means of expression and
I love that we all share and
learn and feel "less alone"
in this world because of
blogging:)

kj said...

jessie, i have to admit i did not know your blog includes your own painting. it was awesome to see it in this post.

i would love to see more of your artwork whenever. and fyi, you showed up in my poetry thursday this week. i hope you don't mind, but there you were in a couple of places!

:)

bee said...

i love you.

i just, simply adore you, dear girl. i can't wait to read the rest of your responses...

i'm so happy we blog, because otherwise we would never have met.

gkgirl said...

i'm loving the template
and have to admit that i
am also not always sure
of what i am blogging,
of what my blog actually is...
is it crafty, mommy, poetry
and then i decided
it is me.

it is who i am everyday...
somedays mommy, somedays wife,
sometimes a poetess, a knitter,
a gardener...
but always me.
and i took the site meter off.
i don't care anymore how many
hits i get
as long as i keep a few good friends
out of it...
i don't need to be popular,
i just want to know that
there are other like minded people
out there...
and now,
i am rambling in your comments
:)

megg said...

well I think that both content and context and template are fabulous - so there!!

Seriously - I come here for the content - don't ever change it! xo

ruby said...

i didn't know that this was your own painting either! you are very talented (but i knew that). i just read through some of your archives last night and to quote bee, i absolutely adore you.

Colorsonmymind said...

That painting is just so gorgeous.

You are a talent, and I so enjoy reading all of your posts!